The broken attractor

Dogsquat uses pattern recognition to figure out his problem with women:

If I talk to two different women about normal stuff for five minutes – different times, different venues, with both women being equally attractive – I’ll come away being really attracted to one of them.

Here’s what I know:

The woman who I’m really attracted to has problems. She’s got a coke habit, sexual abuse issues, an eating disorder – something like that. The women and I won’t talk about that stuff, but my subconscious has picked up on certain patterns and mannerisms. Those subtle cues have rung the fire-bell hanging on the wall where my own personal White Knight hangs out. That bastard starts polishing up his rusty armor and looking around for his sword. He’s gonna go rescue this chick from herself, and he starts conspiring with my limbic system to make me attracted to her.

See? The gal with problems acts a certain, subtle way. Subconsciously, she’s broadcasting her pain/problems out into the world. Because of certain experiences I’ve had/the way I was raised, my antennae are very sensitive to certain signals. Because of those signals, I feel certain things – attraction, the need to rescue, the need to “be there”, etc.

This shouldn't come as a surprise. The man is a paramedic. He's literally wired to rescue people, which is admirable in general but definitely sub-optimal for personal relationships. He is one of the many men who are simply unsuitable to choose their own mates and would benefit from receiving strong guidance from their trusted friends and family members.

It's very important to figure out your historical pattern with women because failing to learn from history will condemn you to repeating it. And learn to place great significance in the non-verbal reactions of your friends to meeting new women. Even if they're not inclined to tell you to your face that you're making the same mistake again, they'll usually let you know in subtler ways.