On March 19th we had Dan Steinberg of the Washington Post's DC Sports Bog on our podcast to discuss a range of issues. Little did we know that he would use the platform to spread his lies and slander about the Washington Capitals and the team's owner, Ted Leonsis. His web of deceit was exposed last night after the Capitals clinched the Southeast Division with a 5-3 win over the aggressively mediocre Winnipeg Jets, so Steinberg apologized on his blog this morning for being wrong about predicting that the Caps wouldn't make the playoffs.
Oh, that's rich.
THIS MAN IS A LIAR!!!!!!
How do you think we feel, Dan? You used us and our substantial influence in the podcasting world to spread your propaganda, advance your anti-truth agenda, and wage your personal war against Ted Leonsis. We opened our Google + accounts to you, gave you our real names, and even let you see our faces while we stared deep into the recesses of your ear as you for some reason felt compelled to lean forward at a 90-degree angle and press your mouth directly up against your phone's microphone (yet it was still difficult to hear you).
Your so-called "apology" to an entity unknown for your vicious untruths will never be enough, Dan.
All we can do while we try to pick up the pieces is apologize to our fans for letting this deviant on our podcast (which you can listen to below) to preach irresponsibly about how he thought a team that was 12-16-1 might not make the playoffs. We never should have exposed you to this monster. For that, we were wrong. And for that, we're sorry.
(Also, Dan, let us know if you ever want to come back on to formally apologize and then Tweet out the link to that podcast like 50 times the next day to get more people to listen. Thanks!)
In honor of A.J. Clemente, the rookie newscaster who got the boot from his North Dakota local news station after spending his first few seconds on live TV spewing profanity, it's time to play, "Pick Your Favorite News Blooper."
Full disclosure here, I anchored local news for a few years in an earlier life, and I promise you, if YouTube existed in the 90's - or if ANYONE had been watching at all - I probably would have been fired like 15 times over. As Finesse will attest, I am prone to laughing fits of up to several minutes in duration, so it wasn't always pretty. Thoughts and prayers for these brave anchors.
There's only one word to describe this podcast with NFL Network luminary and Pittsburgh native Dave Dameshek: epic. This is the definitive podcast about the Pittsburgh Penguins. We talk about this year's Cup chances, the triumphs of 1991 and 1992, the heartbreak of 1993, a night with the Cup in Shadyside, Mario's best goals, apologizing to The Bachelor, and the night Dameshek almost threw down with Wayne Gretzky. True story.
7:2 underdog against The Great One
Set aside an hour and strap yourselves in. It's worth it.
**If you're listening on your smartphone, the best ways to make sure that you have an uninterrupted experience are: 1) download the podcast from iTunes OR 2) download the Spreaker app by going to the App store and searching for "Spreaker" then "Get To Our Game"**
The Washington Capitals continued their surge to the playoffs last night with a lopsided 21 to -23 Corsi victory over the Philadelphia Flyers at the Wachovia Center. The victory capped a dominant weekend for the Caps which saw them crush the Sabres 143 to -143 on Saturday night in Buffalo, a game in which the Capitals relentlessly and indiscriminately fired pucks toward Sabres goalie Ryan Miller.
"It's just huge to get these wins heading down the stretch," said defenseman Jeff Schulz who led the team with +12 Corsis against the Flyers. "Oatesy has been telling us all season to just get that puck on our sticks and let it rip regardless of the score, game situation, or whether it's going to get blocked."
Caps' center Nicklas Backstrom celebrates his second period wrist shot that went wide.
The Caps opened the Corsi-ing with a shot on goal from Troy Brouwer The Flyers answered quickly when defenseman Kimmo Timmonen was able to get his shot blocked by Caps' rookie Steve Oleksy, who gave an emotional apology to his teammates after the first period for letting Timmonen get a shot blocked. Veterans Brooks Laich and Nick Backstrom covered for Oleksy's mistake, with Laich getting a shot blocked and Backstrom following up with a quick shot of his own and then a tip-shot that unfortunately eluded goalie Ilya Bryzgalov and went into the net.
"That was just a bad break for us with the puck going in the Flyers' net," Backstrom said after the game. "We were really tilting the ice that shift and if Hillen had just missed the net with his shot I felt there was a great chance we could have dug the rebound out of the corner. We'll take the one in the net, but a few more biscuits airmailed into the glass would have been ideal."
The Caps' shooting onslaught continued throughout much of the first period, and the Caps got a huge break when an Alex Ovechkin wrister rang off the pipe. After the game, Coach Adam Oates said that he's been working with Ovechkin on hitting the post rather than the back of the net because it still counts as a Corsi point and it's a lot easier to get the rebound. "Plus it just sounds cool," Oates added.
Oates said he was pleased with his team's effort in the opening period with the exception of Ovechkin and Brouwer combining for four attempted shots on a 2-minute 5-on-3 power play. "I thought the boys tired themselves out firing those pucks at the net on the power play. I tell them over and over again, 'Look boys. You don't get any Corsis for shots while you have the power play. Save your energy for 5-on-5 when it really matters.' But they don't listen and they keep trying to score on the power play."
The Caps kept pressing in the second period. After John Carlson missed the net from 65 feet, Jack Hillen put on a one-man Corsi-Show, firing one puck wide from 67 feet and then getting another wrist shot blocked. Steve Oleksy, atoning for his first-period mistake, had his shot blocked and Jason Chimera got in the act with an actual shot on goal. All told, the Caps racked up 5 straight Corsis in only 42 seconds.
Caps forward Mathieu Perreault attempts to block a pass. The Flyers are expected to protest the scorer's ruling that this was a blocked pass, not a blocked shot.
The Caps continued dominating play well into the third period until Flyers forward Jakub Voracek took a 4-minute penalty. The long man-advantage sucked the life out of the Capitals. "It's tough when you know that nothing you do for the next four minutes is going to matter," said power-play specialist Mike Green. "Once we saw Marcus and Alex each snipe Bryzgalov, we knew we were going to be tired and would have to dig deep once the power-plays expired."
"It really felt like the next Corsi would win the game," said Laich.
As they have so often this year, the Caps held on to their Corsi lead. Unsung hero Matt Hendricks got their final Corsi point with a 63 foot shot that went wide with 3:30 remaining in the third. "Matty's been doing that all year for us," said defenseman Karl Alzner. Hendricks' shot gave the Caps plenty of breathing room to withstand a late push by the Flyers who got the final 9 Corsis of the game.
"We took our foot off the gas a little bit, but luckily we had built up an insurmountable lead," Alzner said.
Ruslan Fedotenko scored in the overtime for the Flyers, but because it was played at 4-on-4, it didn't have any impact on the outcome.
Dan Steinberg of the Washington Post Sports Bog joins the podcast to talk Pens-Caps, Ted Leonsis, internet trolling, and everything else you can think of that's entertaining. This may be the best GTOG Podcast yet. A must listen.
It's June 2009. The Pens are down two games to none in the Stanley Cup Finals against Detroit. You lay down to go to bed that night and you can't get the Game 2 loss out of your head. But you close your eyes harder and really try to clear your mind. Then something else pops into your head. And all of a sudden, everything is OK again.
You've heard the commercial 26 times during every playoff game and finally it's working. You spend the morning of Game 3 buying three pairs of khakis and you know -- you just know -- that everything will be ok. Something about that song comforts you, and it's not the wrinkle-free cotton.
Well, it's back. Sort of.
Last night during the Stars-Kings game a Dodge Ram commercial came on. Forget the Pens' epic comeback against the Flyers last night. This is the omen we needed.
If this commercial plays during a Penguins game this season?
It’s our favorite week of the Bachelor season — Hometowns, where the fathers are mustacheoed and The Blessing is on the line. We discuss each Hometown date and the enormous ramifications of Sean’s decision to send Des home. It’s the Raw Emotion Podcast.
And as we discuss on the podcast, Tierra really cannot control her eyebrow, as she made clear to AshLee. It’s called Congenital Eyebrow Disease, and it’s debilitating.
As we’ve discussed on our Raw Emotion Podcasts, this year of The Bachelor has been all about doubling down on the formula because, after all, the formula works. So that’s why ABC decided to double down on The Bachelor this week with not two but FOUR HOURS of Bacheloring. Who exactly was demanding this?
Our Raw Emotion Podcast is going down Tuesday night and will include new Big Kibitz theme music. It’s going to be huge.
In the meantime, download our Bachelor Viewing Guide. It will be the second best decision you ever make. The best will be downloading it, then telling a friend to download it. It’s free, and you will like it.
Before you listen to the podcast, make sure to download The Official Get To Our Game Bachelor Viewing Guide. Whenever we describe a move on The Bachelor or Bachelorette as textbook, THIS IS THE TEXTBOOK. Quick note -- we are circulating the Guide through both GTOG and our spin-off entertainment site, TheBigKibitz.com. Moving forward, that will be the best way to read all entertainment-related posts. Here’s how to download:
If you have an iPad: While on your iPad, click here. That will take you to the Guide’s page in the iBook Store. The Guide is free. You can also just search for "Get To Our Game" in the iBooks Store.
If you don’t have an iPad: You can still capture about 99% of the wisdom by reading the book as a PDF. You can read it by clicking here: GTOG Official Bachelor Viewing Guide PDF.
Now the podcast. It's Episode 4 and that means feelings are getting real, and emotions are getting raw.
We’ve been talking about it for 3 weeks, and it’s finally ready: The Official Get To Our Game Bachelor Viewing Guide. Whenever we describe a move on The Bachelor or Bachelorette as textbook, THIS IS THE TEXTBOOK.
Quick note -- we are circulating the Guide through both GTOG and our spin-off entertainment site, TheBigKibitz.com. Moving forward, that will be the best way to read all entertainment-related posts.
Here’s how to download:
If you have an iPad: While on your iPad, click here. That will take you to the Guide’s page in the iBook Store. The Guide is free. You can also just search for "Get To Our Game" in the iBooks Store.
If you don’t have an iPad: Unfortunately, if you don’t have an iPad you won’t get the full functionality of the book (videos, slideshows, etc), BUT you can still capture about 99% of the wisdom by reading the book as a PDF. You can read it by clicking here: GTOG Official Bachelor Viewing Guide PDF.
The thing about raw emotion is that it is always raw, even if it is two days late. Due to traveling and the start of NHL season, we were a couple days late with this week's Bachelor podcast (to say nothing of not having anything last week).
On the podcast we introduce the GTOG spinoff site where we will be housing all of our future entertainment content, including our Bachelor and Bachelorette posts and podcasts. Here's a hint: you can find it at www.TheBigKibitz.com. Much more to come on this in the next few days.
The podcast is below, but since we are a few days late, I thought we'd include a quick recap of the episode, segment by segment. Click here to subscribe on iTunes.
Teaser The teaser opens with Sean on a roller coaster, so you have to assume one of these women is afraid of heights and/or had a brother die on a ferris wheel. We also see shots of him doing pec flys without his shirt on, his sweaty back pressed up against the machine. I once worked out topless at my aunt's condo in Siesta Key and sweated so much over every piece of equipment that they probably called an emergency condo board meeting to fine my aunt. We also see that an ambulance is involved, a woman is on a stretcher, and the other women are praying for her.
1 on 1 with Leslie M. There are going to be three dates tonight -- one group date and two 1-on-1s. In other words, it's a huge week. Chris Harrison advises the ladies to use their time wisely. The first date card is for Leslie M., the D.C. based political consultant, and asks, "How long will this love last?" Leslie M. wants to "take their relationship to the next level" because "this is what she's been waiting for." She may need to dream bigger. Sean takes her to the Guinness World Record Museum on Hollywood Blvd. because "she's fun to interact with." We learn that Sean's dad owns the Guinness world record for "Shortest Amount of Time Driving the Contiguous 48 States" which is the natural byproduct of his other world record, "Having the Least Amount of Things to Do." If Sean's dad can't be dead (which is Sean's only mistake so far this season) he might as well be into trivial nothingness. Can't wait 'til hometowns.
To set the world record for kiss length, Sean and Leslie M. kiss for 3 minutes and 16 seconds, during which Leslie M. calls Hollywood Blvd. "one of the craziest places in America." Does anyone know what this means? During the kiss, Sean gets in like 15 hand-ass brushes, and Leslie M. says this is the best day of her life. GTOG thinks she is a contender: pretty blonde girls in D.C. who work in politics are usually religious and almost exclusively Republican. There's an 80% chance she's slept with Tom DeLay and a 30% chance she's related to him. This is Sean's wheelhouse. They cap off their date by complimenting how uncomfortable they make each other. Leslie M. tells Sean that he makes her so nervous and he responds, "I'm glad I make you nervous because you made me feel very uncomfortable coming out of the limo." A Rose for Leslie M....
....with a side of herpes?
Group Date
"Who is going to win my heart?" asks the date card. "Who cares?" asks America. Taryn is part of the group date which depresses me because I find her repugnant to the journey. She is the health club manager who wept during the opening cocktail party for no reason at all, something that should have brought her, and whatever gym she manages, great shame. I despise this woman. I have a hard time watching this show objectively because of it. I also know this is an enormous overreaction on my part.
Sean does pushups with someone on his back while everyone frolics and throws a football around. Chris Harrison shows up at beach wearing long brown pants, reminding America that (to the best of my recollection) we've never seen his bare legs. Chris Harrison's legs are the new Robin Quivers' breasts. A cutthroat 6-on-6 volleyball game is set up so the winning team gets more time with Sean. Daniella calls it, "literally my worst nightmare." Taryn is shown on the screen again, and I simply write in my notes, "Karyn again. Really can't stand this woman." (Note: I thought Taryn's name was Karyn for the whole episode). I'm rooting for the team Taryn isn't on, and a tsunami. Thankfully Taryn's team loses. Sean says he wanted to spend quality time with them, but he's also happy to spend quality time with the winning six. This is a meaningless thought. It is revealed that Daniela is wearing a wrap around the bottom of her bathing suit, something someone once told me is a warning sign. At least four of the six losing girls are weeping, indicating they are all crazy or their cycles synced up quicker than usual. Or both.
On the winning date, Lindsay the substitute teacher makes out with Sean and asks, "what more can I ask?" She'll hang around for a while but is unremarkable. Desiree, the current favorite, gets more time with Sean and displays eye contact far superior to Leslie M. Sean tells someone I don't know that there is a lot he doesn't know about her. Join the club.
Desiree doesn't think Amanda is right for Sean and seems determined to make a fuss about it. This would be disappointing to us if Desiree's complaint was that Amanda wasn't there for the right reasons, but note the subtle difference between "not here for the right reasons" and "not right for him" -- Amanda may be there for the right reasons, but still not be right for Sean. Desiree clearly knows what she's doing. Her biggest obstacle now is overconfidence.
Kacie B., whose occupation is listed as "Ben's season," decides that she needs to tell Sean something about Desiree and Amanda. What? No idea. Why? Your guess is as good as ours. Kacie B. tells Sean that she doesn't feel like it is her place to be telling him this, but that this has put her between a rock and a hard place. Sean asks her why she is telling him this. (Still no idea what "this" is). She says she doesn't know why she's telling him this. She says she doesn't want to be the person who tells him this, but at the same time she is stuck in the middle so she has to tell him this. (Still no clue what she has told him). Kacie B. says she's not a drama person and she's having a hard time being herself because of this. She says this hurts her because she doesn't want to hurt either of them. ("This" is still elusive). Sean asks her why she is involving herself in that. (No idea what "that" is, or if "this" and "that" are the same thing). Kacie says she's asked herself that and that she doesn't want Sean to think that he is not her focus. "Is this going to be something that bothers you?" she asks. Sean says he just wants her to be Kacie B., not the crazy person she's being. Kacie says her plan may not be working. YOU THINK?!?!
AshLee's 1-on-1
AshLee, the 32-year-old with the formidable body, is a "personal organizer." This means she spends her days organizing her personal life, not organizing someone else's life. Right before AshLee's 1-on-1, Tierra falls down the steps and hits her head. Cameras don't catch the fall, but the sound guy earned his bonus by adding what sounded like a sonic boom sound effect to indicate that someone fell. Hysteria ensues in the house while the girls and Sean are praying that Tierra is OK. An ambulance is called and Tierra is put on a stretcher. As soon as she realized that leaving the house is the end of her attention, she pops up from the stretcher like Rod Tidwell in Jerry McGuire.
During the date they go to Six Flags with two young girls with disabilities. It's a nice moment. AshLee praises Sean's integrity. Reality Steve texts the two disabled girls for information then writes a 14,000 word post to the "haters."
AshLee goes to the Scale of Horrible Things early and reveals that she is adopted and was abused at the foster home. She makes a point of telling Sean that it wasn't sexual abuse. Sean's favorite band, The Eli Young Band, plays while they dance. What are the chances that Sean's favorite band wouldn't be an emo country band? Sean sees no problem with AshLee being adopted. AshLee cries about "immersing herself into the possibility of loving this man for the rest of her life." I weep when I watch Mario Lemieux's breakaway goal against the Flyers in the '97 playoffs.
Cocktail Party Classic cocktail party this week: not everyone got time with Sean, so they all need to get time with Sean. Sean takes Sarah out to the driveway to surprise her with her dog. This makes Sarah, the girl with one arm, feel special. Tierra tells Sean that she is embarrassed that she fell; Sean asks Tierra if she "trusts it." Again with the vague pronouns. Desiree steals Sean from Tierra but then Tierra steals him back. It's a real back-and-forth cocktail party. Other women are stunned that Tierra is getting a second conversation with Sean. Is this in the rules? Is this even allowed? Desiree tears up about having to play "the game" -- you know, The Bachelor game -- on The Bachelor. Kacie B. gets interrupted while she apologizes to Sean and is left thinking, "I can only pray that everything works out." Sean, meanwhile, is praying that he will be led in the right direction by his heart. Dueling prayers. Let's see what God decides...
DOWN GOES KACIE B.!
God's plan is that Kacie B. and Sean are better off as friends, as Sean dismisses her before the Rose Ceremony. She says she leaves with no regrets. Maybe because she used them all up during her last comeback?
Rose Ceremony Drama is manufactured as Sean saves Desiree for the last rose. He calls her "Des" which is a clear signal to the rest of the ladies that this woman is for real. The other losers are Kristy the model and Taryn. YESSSSS!!!!! GOOOOO HOMMMMEEEEEE TARYN!!!!! ENOUGH OF THIS WOMAN ON TV.
By Artistry Here, with no context whatsoever, are the top 10, OK, the only 10 things my mother-in-law said during Episode 3 of The Bachelor:
10. "Look where they put these people."
9. "Political consultant: what does that mean?"
8. "Where are they? They're in California? No. Where are they?"
7. "What do you think about Harrison getting a divorce?"
6. "So what's a political consultant?"
This is a political consultant.
5. "That's right. It's amazing."
4. "Not a bad body. He's in good proportion."
3. "Nah. There's nothing between these two."
2. "That's why she wasn't picked the first time. Oh, you idiot. You lost it kiddo."
And the number one thing my mother-in-law said during Episode 3 of The Bachelor is:
1. "I don't understand. You recorded it? You don't have to watch the commercials? What night is it? What night is it on? You recorded it? OK."
Thank you all for your patience as Finesse gets this whole Japan phase out of his system. We're on track for a Wednesday night Raw Emotion Podcast full of a lot of pent up feelings.
It's a new season of The Bachelor, but it's exactly the same as always. We kick off the year with a new Raw Emotion Podcast, breaking down our feelings after an emotional premiere, a guest appearance from Mrs. Artistry, and some predictions.
By GTOG Staff As you strap yourselves in for Season 17 of the Bachelor (premiering tonight on ABC at 8/7c), you may be a touch concerned that you won't be able to stomach a lengthy stretch of two hour visits with Sean, maybe the most generic Bachelor since Brad. Wait, that was only two seasons ago. In any event, put your worries aside. There's one thing that's about to become clear: you'll never watch this show in the same way again.
THREE black ladies?
We created an iBook previewing this season, and really every other season, that is finished and loaded into iTunes. It's just not available yet as of 4:27pm. Apparently the Apple people are confirming its authenticity or something, which is strange because GTOG is the most trusted name in the blogging business. Anyway, here's the cover:
It's pretty cool. This is what our announcement was going to be because we assumed it would be ready by now:
Ladies and Gentleman, we present to you the Official GTOG Bachelor(ette) Viewing Guide, which you can download here on iTunes. From the introductory cocktail party tonight right through to moment Sean breaks up with Brook, the 25-year-old community organizer from Pittsburgh, in June, you will learn to study, rely on, and possibly sleep with this book. We're not asking for thanks, and we're not asking for money. Just be true to your Journey.
We will post/tweet/etc as soon as it's ready. GTOG Everybody.
