PODCAST: Pens win, 4-3; Crosby takes charge

Harder than it needed to be, but a huge win in Game 2.  Sidney Crosby owned their whole team.

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11 in a Row: Pens flummox Islanders, 4-2

By Artistry

Remember when we were concerned about the Penguins winning the supposedly hyper-competitive Atlantic Division? No longer an issue. We know the Penguins are winning the Atlantic Division. They're now 14 points up on New Jersey. They're 16 points up on the Rangers. And the Pens are 21 points up on the Flyers, who come to town on Sunday night. This is all after playing 32 games, mind you.

Even though they were awful for much of the game in Long Island Friday night, the Penguins got heroic efforts from Tomas Vokoun, Brandon Sutter, Paul Martin, and Finesse, who led what looked like a stampede of Pens fans into Nassau Coliseum. And can't forget Matt Niskanen, who played 23 minutes and fired 5 shots on net almost immediately after we identified him as trade piece #1 on the roster. Touche, Matty Niskanen. Touche.

No parades, obviously. Still, fun times.

Lockout: The Grand NHL Tradition Continues!

By Artistry

No negotiations will take place between the league and the NHLPA on Saturday, meaning the 4th NHL work stoppage in 20 years is a virtual certainty.

Um, what's so funny?

We have major issues with both the players and the owners, and we don't feel like talking about them.  It won't make us feel better, and it won't make you feel better either.  Just one note to the Pittsburgh media:  don't tell us we need to like Gary Bettman because of his efforts to keep the Penguins in Pittsburgh.  It was a f***ing no-brainer to keep the Penguins in Pittsburgh.  You think Kansas City was going to lead the whole f***ing league in local TV ratings?  Gary Bettman is about to preside over his third lockout as commissioner.  Gary Bettman put the NHL in unsustainable markets like Atlanta, Phoenix and Miami.  Gary Bettman sucks.

Gary, gay kaken afen yam

It's Yiddish. Look it up.

Pens trade Jordan Staal to Carolina for Brandon Sutter; GTOG Reacts

By Finesse

The Pens traded Jordan Staal to the Carolina Hurricanes for Brandon Sutter, Brian Dumoulin, and the #8 pick (used to draft defenseman Derrick Pouliout).  Sutter will be the Staal replacement on the third line.  Dumoulin is a 20 year old defensive prospect, and Pouliout is reportedly a Letangesque prospect.  The Pens opened up about $2 million in cap space by dropping Staal's salary ($4 million) for Sutter's ($2 million through 2013-14).

Rumors on TV are that the Pens are gearing up to make a big run at a big time free agent....maybe even Zach Parise.  Dear God.

It's going to take a lot of reflection to really process this trade, but here are the initial thoughts...

I can't help but have really good memories of Jordan Staal.  He scored some of the biggest goals in Pens playoff history, never complained about his role, always did exactly what was asked of him, and just generally was a huge beast.  There were times when he was maddeningly unproductive, but if you look at any of the Pens' biggest wins in the past 6 years, Staal was prominently involved.

At the same time, the longer this saga dragged on, the more ridiculous the romancing of Jordan Staal became.  He's not a "superstar" in this league -- he never has been, and it's impossible to say for certain that he will be.  His career high in points?  50.  He did that this year in only 62 games, but before you get all "that's a 66 point pace over 82 games!" on me, pause and think about 3 things:

1) That's a 66 point pace over 82 games.  It's not even a point-per-game pace and it's not even that close.  If 66 points is sounding familiar to you, that's because it's how many points Crosby had in 2010 before his concussion.  In 41 games.

2) Staal played a lot of those 62 games as the Pens #2 center, the exact role he will be playing (maybe) in Carolina behind his brother Eric.  He got power play time, he got to play with second-line quality wingers ... and he produced 50 points.  That's not bad, but it's not great.

3) Jordan Staal is going to be 24 when the season starts and he's been in the league for 6 years.  There are two ways to look at that -- one is that he's young, and maybe his best years are in front of him.  The other is to say that you forfeit the "potential" label, or at least can't rely on it so much, after you've been in the league for 6 years and played around 20 minutes every night.  There's an argument to be made that if you're actually point-per-game guy and you play 20 minutes a night, you'll produce at that pace, regardless of whether you're the first, second, or third line center.  And the history of the NHL is full of guys who peak statistically in their early 20s.

None of this is meant to suggest that Staal isn't an extremely unique and valuable player, or that he doesn't have room to continue to grow.  It's to reinforce the point that we just don't know.  So when Staal turned down a extremely generous 10-year, $60 million dollar contract (reportedly), it became a hostage situation and the Pens weren't holding the gun.  Staal had to go.  Once you start paying over $6 million to a guy who averaged 0.8 points per game in his best offensive season, you've become Glen Sather.

So while the Pens are not going to have a better 3rd line center than Staal next season, a lot of teams win the Stanley Cup with 3rd line centers that aren't as good as Staal.  Jordan Staal has a unique game, but in terms of the value he brings to the Penguins -- scoring from the third-line, great penalty killing, general toughness -- those are eminently replaceable traits.  We can get that from someone else.  Hopefully, it's Brandon Sutter.

Sutter pedigree > Staal pedigree

As for the rest of the return, we're not going to pretend like we know.  It all depends on how Dumoulin and Pouliot turn out.  "Experts" are going to talk about their potential, but the truth is that we just won't know for at least a couple years.  And that's the really scary part of this trade.  Until we know what those guys become, the truth is that we just gave up Jordan Staal for a third line center and some cap space.

Again, I completely understand Staal's desire to not spend the prime of his career behind to sure-fire first ballot hall-of-famers.  But it's a little curious that he's so intent on going to Carolina to play not with his brother, but behind his brother.  I always figured that if Staal was intent on leaving Pittsburgh, it was because he wanted to embrace the challenge of trying to be THE guy.  By going to Carolina, he's stepping out of two shadows, but into a bigger one.  And he's also going to have to worry about another center, Jeff Skinner, who scored more points in his rookie season (63) than Staal has ever scored in a single season.  With the opportunity to play with Eric and his family moving to NC, it's an understandable decision.  But a curious one.

We'll have a lot more reaction as we continue to process this trade and whatever other moves the Pens make.  We will look back fondly on Staal's time as part of the Pens' "core."  But in the salary-cap NHL, you can't have The Situation's abs.  You're not going to have an 8-pack, a 6-pack, or even a 4-pack.  Sometimes, you have to be happy settling for just 2.  And that's ok with us.

Assessing the Pirates and the Rod Barajas Era

By Finesse

We're 26 games in to the Rod Barajas Era, so let's assess how great this signing has been.  For those who don't know, Barajas was the Pirates' big free agent acquisition last November, brought on board for his veteran moxie (he's 36), huge bat (career .236 average), and because someone had to be the catcher.

But if you're going to sit in your ivory tower and judge Barajas's season by his .188 batting average, 3 RBI in 80 at bats (THAT'S RIGHT I SAID 3 RBI IN 80 AT BATS!), 13 RBI pace for the whole season (THAT'S RIGHT I SAID 13 RBI PACE FOR THE WHOLE SEASON!), then I've got news for you.  You don't know jack about Rod Barajas.

No one commands a pitching staff like Rodrigo Richard Barajas.  No one.

Rod F'ing Barajas, bitch.

The Pirates' pitching staff has the 4th best team ERA in the entire league.  That is not a typo.  Many of you still don't think this proves the Barajas-Effect.  You'll point to the fact that last year the Pirates had the 8th best team ERA in the majors heading into the All-Star break, but the 27th best team ERA after the All-Star break (they finished the season 17th overall).  You expect a similar collapse this year.

You Barajas-deniers are forgetting that the Bucs played 8 different catchers last season.  This year, the Pirates have relied on only two catchers -- the rock solid Rod Barajas, and that guy Mike McKenry who hit some unreal game winning home run last June.

But before anyone gets all jazzed up about what McKenry brings to the table offensively, let's put the myth that he's in Barajas's's's league to bed.  The numbers don't lie: McKenry has two-thirds the amount of RBI as Barajas does this season. (2 divided by 3 = 2/3)

So be thankful that Rod Barajas is on the Pirates, but be mindful that Rod Barajas doesn't belong to the Pirates.  Because Rod Barajas belongs to no one.  Rod Barajas belongs to everyone.

Embarajasing

GTOPG: Pens Squash Desparate Canes; Win, 3-2

By Artistry

Sidney Crosby took another step forward in his return to dominating the NHL on Saturday, previewing for the rest of the conference what the Penguins will look like when they roll out Sid, Geno, and Staal on consecutive shifts, you manage to limit the damage, and then Arron Asham, Craig Adams, and Richard Park jump down your throat.  This 3-2 win in Carolina will be remembered for a possibly unprecedented kill of a two-man advantage for a full two minutes at the end of regulation when Pittsburgh's top two penalty killers - Staal and Cooke - weren't even on the ice.  Brent Johnson was impenetrable.  Brooks Orpik was in beast mode.  But this was mostly about how fruitless it can be to try to keep pace with a Penguins team that has its horses up front going at a full gallop.  Incredible prelude to Monday night's game against the formidable Bruins, and a reminder to new Carolina coach Kirk Muller that he will go down in history as #2.

We're busy watching the Bengals botch field goals right now, so no full recap. Hoping Jordan Staal is OK and gearing up for tomorrow.  LGP.

Largely Hypothetical Penguins Prospect Profile: Beau Bennett

By Artistry

Penguins training camp is underway, people are breathlessly tweeting the news every time Zybnek Michalek farts, and observers swear Geno Malkin is in the best shape of his life even though he says he's not. Excitement is running high. We're doing our part by giving you the inside scoop on our near baseless evaluations of some of the prospects looking to make an impression at camp. Today's subject: 2010 first round draft pick Beau Bennett.  

In short, we're high on Beau. For several reasons. First, Beau Bennett does not play Penguin hockey, and we mean that in the best possible sense. He is not a high energy kid with a positive attitude who loves to compete but who will never get you 30 or 40 goals. He is an occassionally disengaged former roller hockey player from California who probably will get you 30 or 40 goals while stoned. Sign us up.


Softest handshake of the 2010 draft

It's OK to introduce a little creativity on the wings. Really. That brings us to the second, related point: Bennett is described as a superb puckhandler who "has a diverse repertoire of shots and moves with the puck." Wait, are we sure we know what to do with someone like this? Aren't we more comfortable with wingers who have only one move with the puck, like the Dupuis shot or the Kennedy move? Really, what are we going to do with you Beau?

And there's the thing that really puts the kid over the top: what a name. Not Bo, Beau. Other famous Beau's include Beau Bridges, Beau Brummell, and Beau Peep, who is a loveable loser and a coward, but never mind. Here are some Beau highlights from 2010.



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Somebody Take the Toy Away From Ovechkin

By Artistry

Every once in far too short an amount of time, Alex Ovechkin goes on a monumental, nonsensical, exclamation point-laden Twitter binge.  We follow these things so you don't have to.  Now I'm going to ask you to close your eyes while I tell you a story.  I want you to listen to me. I want you to listen to yourselves. I want you to imagine a hockey player.  He's on his smart phone.  He's tweeting.  He's unleashing a torrent of "he he he's" and "ha ha ha's."  A "have now chicken wings" and an "it's so good!!  mmmm hahahah."  Can you see him?  His broken teeth, his crooked nose, his indescribable hair, hunched over, cackling as he types, probably with his thumbs.  Can you see him?  I want you to picture that hockey player.  Now imagine he's your captain.  The defense rests your honor.

Not Trending

One More Move to Make: Pens Should Jettison Niskanen

By Artistry

We don't know much about Alexandre Picard, the journeyman depth defenseman signed Wednesday by the Penguins, but we do know this:  he's a depth defenseman.  He gives the Pens eight guys that Ray Shero knows can play realistic minutes in the NHL in Letang, Orpik, Michalek, Martin, Niskanen, Lovejoy, Engelland, and Picard.  No, we are not counting the guy Sidney Crosby punched in the nether-regions.*  Consider that there are really two tiers of d-men here.  You've got the top 4, big money guys, and then you've got the bargain basement second tier of Lovejoy, Engelland, and Picard (all making less than $600K).  There's only one guy who doesn't fit comfortably in either group: Matty Niskanen.  He makes $1.5 million against the cap, and for all the things he brought to the table when he came to the Pens in the Neal-Goligoski swap - smooth skating, a right-handed shot, a ready-made nickname - Matty Ice caused some severe butt-clenching when we watched him handle the puck in his own zone.  It's time to move him.

Sorry, Matty

Lovejoy and Engelland have shown they can at the very least handle full time regular season duty on the third d-pairing.  Picard is a serviceable 7th defenseman.  And there are a bunch of kids knocking on the door: Simon Despres, Brian Strait, Carl Sneep, and Robert Bortuzzo could all be ready to play limited minutes in case of an injury.  Strait already did so last season.  The Pens would still have a deep bench, and there is currently cap room available to sign another veteran defenseman on the cheap.

We know some team is bound to step up and trade for a guy like Niskanen.  There are about 20 teams in the NHL that would probably give the pending RFA a raise.  Of like $3 million.  Maybe Shero can snag a lower line winger with some size and grit in return.  We could recapture some of what we lost in letting Rupp and Godard walk.  Or trade for a draft pick and save the extra cap space for greater in-season flexibility.  Any way we look at it, GTOG says the Pens benefit more from dealing Matty Ice than from keeping him.  Great nickname, though.

* Some debate has arisen on our Facebook page as to where exactly Boris I-Got-Punched-In-The-Nuts Valabik was actually hit by Sid and whether this is encompassed by our use of "nether regions."  Let Urban Dictionary decide.

Top 5 July 1st Stunners

By Artistry

After a bewildering and emotional first few days of NHL free agency, let's review the Top 5 stunners:

5. The Capitals think they won the Stanley Cup.

Except they didn't.  Again.  OK, so this isn't the least bit surprising, but I couldn't leave it out. GM George McPhee, last seen on the verge of tears and sinking into the side of an elevator on some episode of 24/7, deserves kudos for shipping Semyon Varlamov to Colorado for 1st and 2nd round draft choices, snagging Troy Brouwer from the Hawks for a 1st round pick, and somehow convincing UFA Tomas Vokoun - a legit number 1 goalie - to sign for 1 year at $1.5 million.  Stellar.  McPhee somewhat undermined these moves by overpaying free agents Brooks Laich, Joel Ward, and Roman Hamrlik, but there is no doubt the Caps were a big winner this weekend. The key phrase being "this weekend."  But the Caps being the Caps, they basically raised a championship banner on July 1.  You would think Ted Leonsis would have learned by now to avoid premature coronations, but you'd be wrong.  He's already written another love letter to his team.

"We're tremendous, don't you think?"

4. Christian Erhoff will make more than Sidney Crosby this year.

You think Paul Martin is overpaid?  Maybe he is.  But Ray Shero was ahead of the curve last season when he locked up Martin and Zbynek Michalek long term, because people lost their minds on Friday scrambling to sign the top defenseman in an increasingly thin field of free agents.  Columbus signed James Wisniewski to a 6 year, $33 million deal.  Let that sink in.  Now consider that the Penguins have Kris Letang at a $3.5 million cap hit for three more seasons.

Looking Up at James Wisniewski

3. Dale Tallon took his talents to South Beach and completely blew up the market.

Dale Tallon is the salary cap genius who as Blackhawks GM signed Brian Campbell to that 8-year, $7.1 million dollar per year contract, hamstringing the Hawks and forcing them to dismantle a Cup champion, at least until Chicago finally - incredibly - had that albatross lifted from its neck by - wait for it - Panthers GM Dale Tallon!  And Tallon was just getting started.  When the clock struck noon on Friday, in a race to hit the salary cap floor, Tallon shelled out about $18 million per season for a tasting menu of Tomas Fleischmann (4 yrs, $18 million), Scottie Upshall (4 yrs, $14 million), Tomas Kopecky (4 yrs, $12 million), Sean Bergenheim (4 yrs, $11 million), Marcel Goc (3 yrs, $5.1 million), and - this is the best - 35-year-old Ed Jovanovski (4 yrs, $16.5 million).  Not exactly five star dining.  In fact, I just threw up a little in my mouth.  By this measure, Max Talbot at 5 yrs, $9 million almost makes sense.  Almost.

2. Paul Holmgren is on crack.

We love Max Talbot.  Game 7 hero, great locker room guy, wonderful in the community, yada, yada, yada.  But it was highly questionable for Ray Shero to even offer Talbot a three year deal.  Based solely on production - not character or reputation - Talbot may have had a problem cracking the Penguin lineup as soon as this season.  If everybody's healthy, the following forwards are certain to be among the top 12 coming out of training camp:  Crosby, Malkin, Staal, Kunitz, Kennedy, Dupuis, Cooke, Neal, Adams, Sullivan, and Asham.  That would have left Talbot to battle Letestu, Jeffrey, and Tangradi for the final spot.  Anybody think that was sure thing for Max?  He had to take that Flyers contract.  It's hard to swallow for the fans, I understand, but come on.  Talbot disappeared for long stretches in each of the last two seasons, scoring a grand total of 10 goals.  He is going to be stealing from the Flyers for the next half decade.  All I can tell you Max is, thanks again.

"Don't wake Holmgren."

1. Jaromir Jagr is either a moron, a liar, or both.

Too harsh?  We don't need to rehash everything that went down on #jagrwatch.  Let's just leave it at this:    Jagr attempted to explain his choice to join the Flyers by reasoning that Crosby, Malkin, Datsyuk, and Zetterberg are all left-handed, and he prefers working with right-handed centers like Briere and Giroux.  Makes about as much sense as anything that happened this weekend.

Could Have Sworn He Was Left-Handed, Too

Pens Snag Steve Sullivan

By Artistry

Reports are 1-year, $1.5 million. No clue if he's healthy, but he'll probably play more games than Jagr.  Had groin issues last year, but didn't we all.  And at 36, he's still got legit 60 point potential.  Possible big reward, which is all we really could have hoped for at this point.  Look at the speed and skill:

A World Gone Mad: Holmgren Scours for Shero's Sloppy Seconds; Sather Pays Rupp

By Artistry

Everything is spinning. I'm glad I'm sitting down. 

Max Talbot is going to the Flyers for 5 years and $9 million.  That is not a typo.

Stone Cold Thief

Glen Sather just gave 4th liner wing Mike Rupp a 3 year contract for $4.5 million.  Wait.  Of course he did.  It's Glen Sather.  

This is not a dark day for the Penguins.  Emotional?  Sure.  But it's the Rangers and Flyers that just extravagantly overpaid for depth players.  Bizarre all the way around. 

The Betrayal

Enjoy your Flyers jersey, Jagr. You'll need to wear it to the Hall of Fame, because ours is no longer available.

See you in the handshake line next spring.

GTOG NHL Free Agency Liveblog 2011

By Artistry

What a week.  Here's what we know today about the free agency outlook for the Penguins: Jaromir Jagr and Tyler Kennedy are still in play.  Max Talbot and Mike Rupp are gone.  No one knows exactly how this will play out, but we'll navigate the emotional mine field together, in real time. GTOG will be updating this post until I leave work at 4 pm all day long. 

Glad you think this is funny.

12:24 PM - I'm done for the day unless the Pens do something else. Just don't have the wherewithal right now.

12:14 PM - Red Wings have also pulled out of the Jagr sweeps. Well played, Svoboda.  Moron.

12:13 PM - Pens sign Tyler Kennedy to 2 year contract at $2 million per. This will be controversial, but it shouldn't be. He would have gotten close to $3 million on the open market. 

11:40 AM - OH NO. Jagr offer revoked.

11:20 AM - Trib now reporting a deal with Kennedy is almost done. No news on Jagr.

11:15 AM - It's almost like giving more than $5 million a year to this guy. 

11:14 AM - That said, $33 million for Wisniewski is questionable at best.

11:06 AM - Reports that Columbus signs James Wisniewski to a 6-year, $33 million deal.  This combined with Thursday's Erhoff signing supports Shero's contention that - outside of franchise centers - mobile defensemen are the most valuable commodities in the league.

Note to Jagr: We Remember You When

"You don't want to spoil that kid. You hope he never changes."  Clock is ticking.

Petr Svoboda Calls it a Night; Ray Shero Never Sleeps

By Artistry

There goes the Penguins artificial Wednesday deadline to fish or cut bait with Jaromir Jagr, who said he'd have a decision like 6 hours ago and has now evidently disappeared, leaving his poor agent to field phone calls from mischievous pensbloggers.  Who would pull something like this?  Only Jagr.  Or LeBron.

Meanwhile, Shero hasn't blinked. Pens resign Arron Asham tonight to a 1 year, $775,000 deal.  After leading the team in offense during the 2011 playoffs, we'd say it's fair that he now accounts for about 1% of the team's payroll.

Bank.

Hello, Jaromir?

You there?

If you can hear us, don't go to Detroit. Go toward the light.

GTOG's Jaromir Jagr Anthem: Mullet Man (To the Tune of "Renegade")

By Artistry

With news breaking late Monday night that the Penguins hope to get at least verbal commitments from both Jaromir Jagr and Tyler Kennedy by week's end, we're taking #jagrwatch to another level.  Because we know nothing inspires fans from our city quite like "Renegade" by Styx, we've asked the extraordinarily talented Daniel Marcus to create a Jagr anthem by borrowing liberally from that most Pittsburgh of tunes.  From the man who brought you the timeless classic "Sushi with Hilary Duff," here is "Mullet Man."

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"Mullet Man" Lyrics (to the tune of "Renegade)

Oh Jagr I'm in fear for the season if we don't sign you this week.
Time now to put an end to your running cause you're so far from your home.
Oh Jagr I can hear you crying, you're so scared and all alone.
Friday is coming quick like your backhand, and we don't have very long.

The jig is up the news is out we've finally found you,
The superstar who went astray, oh how we missed you, too.
Never more to go away,
This will be the signing day, of the mullet man. The muuuullet maaaaaan.

Skate down the ice with your sexy hair flowing,
waiting on the halfboards for a pass from Sidney Crosby.
Jaromir, improve our power play.
Use your mullet, use your mullet
to help you with hockey.
Your sexy mullet flowing behind you.
Skating down the ice with your mullet behind you.

Best Week Ever: Pens Draft; #Crosbywatch; #Malkinwatch; #Jagrwatch

By Artistry

It's one of our favorite weeks of the year at GTOG. The NHL draft, paradigm-altering trades, the free agent frenzy. It's a hockey oasis in the summer desert. Let's take stock of where we are as we begin the countdown to July 1.

- Anyone who tells you he has a substantive reaction to the Penguins' draft is probably either paid to scout teenagers or Joe Morrow's coach. All we really know about these kids is what other people say about them, and we're not particularly interested in hearsay or speculation. What we do know today is there is more to Ray Shero's draft philosophy than taking the best player available. Some patterns have emerged. Here's the philosphy behind the philosophy:

     1. Mobile Defensemen, Mobile Defensemen, Mobile Defensemen

Shero has made no secret of his view that guys who can retrieve the puck and quickly transition the other way are the most valuable commodities in today's NHL. Enter Brian Strait, Alex Grant, Simon Despres, and now Morrow and Scott Harrington. Stockpile as many of these players as you like; you will never have too much inventory. You will always find some team willing to give you their James Neal for your Alex Goligoski or their Nathan Horton for your Dennis Wideman. These players are so in demand, you'll even find some team willing to take Brian Campbell's $7.1 million salary cap hit off your hands. [Shaking head in disbelief.] There is something to be said for this approach particularly when drafting late in Round 1, when future success becomes so much harder to predict.

Already Coveted by Florida GM Dale Tallon

     2. Gamble on Skill

Certain 18-year-olds are pegged as franchise forwards only because they have the body of a grown man to go with their fully formed offensive game and uncanny hockey sense. Needless to say, if you're regularly drafting outside the top 10, you're not getting those kids.* Instead, a team like the Penguins can wait to grab players who have the skill and the hockey sense, but don't necessarily have the build or the pedigree. This year's 6th round choice, Josh Archibald, along with recent draft choices like Tom Kuhnhackl and Ben Hanowski, may fade into obscurity.** Or they may end up regularly potting 40 goals on Sidney Crosby's wing. You don't know, and it won't hurt you to find out. Call it the Robbie Brown Axiom.

     3. Steer Clear of Europe

I don't think Ray Shero has anything against Europeans, per se. I'm pretty sure if he were in Craig Patrick's shoes in 2004, he would have selected Evgeni Malkin. On the other hand, no one can argue that there's been a pretty pronounced shift in draft strategy since the days when Patrick took Milan Kraft and Konstantin Koltsov in the first round. It may just be a coincidence, but we now have a six year sample size to go on, and put it this way, the Penguins are not going out of there way to find Sweden's answer to Josh Archibald. There's much less certainty that a European player will ever make his way overseas, and that may be all there is to this. It's just a slightly riskier play.

- Positive news Monday on the Crosby and Malkin injury front. Although it's heartening to see Sid "progressing in his activity," as Jack Adams Dan Bylsma puts it, talk to me after he's been through a week or two of full contact drills.  Then you might see some smiling going on at GTOG headquarters. Until then, we're all business. 

- Anticipation builds as #jagrwatch continues.  Is Bro-tistry now in the studio recording an original Jaromir Jagr song?  I'm not going to tell you he isn't.  Stay tuned.

"See you on the power play. I'll be open on the half boards."

- Is there any such thing as a terrible contract in the NHL these day?  I wonder.  I thought for sure Glen Sather had dirt on Bob Gainey two years ago when he somehow managed to get Montreal to take on Scott Gomez's $7.4 million contract.  But then last week Chicago dumped Campbell on Florida.  Hey, enjoy that $7 million cap hit through 2016.  Sure, the Panthers needed to make a dramatic play to hit the salary cap floor, but Brian Campbell wasn't even a top tandem defenseman for the Blackhawks.  The lesson:  never underestimate the ability of an NHL GM to shock your sensibilities. 

- If by the end of this week the Penguins have both Tyler Kennedy and Jagr on the roster, Ray Shero gets a statue downtown.

LGP. 

* Unless one of them falls, precipitously, as in the case of Angelo Esposito.  If an Esposito falls, there is probably a reason for it, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't take him and flip him in a package with two other overrated players in exchange for Marian Hossa and Pascal Dupuis. We always support this kind of move.

** Let's face it, they are already pretty obscure.

Pens Re-Sign Navy Seal Craig Adams

By Artistry

If you know anything about GTOG, you know we're huge fans of Craig Adams.  He was the biggest bargain on the team at $550,000 per year.  And as of today, he'll still be the biggest bargain on the team after signing a two-year deal at $675,000 per year.  Adams certainly left some money on the table he could have gotten from some other team in free agency, but he had to realize what a great fit this is for everybody involved.  Great move.

Celebrating By Doing 800 Pushups